Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize