I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
