life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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