Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
