Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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