Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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