i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
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I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
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I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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