girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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