I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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