my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize