I never want to see another naked old woman again.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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