Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
