I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.