im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
