it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I want to be your penis for a week.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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