he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize