I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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