This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
