im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Are we still banned from the library?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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