WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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