Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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