Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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