I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I didn't notice because vodka
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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