forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just puked most of my soul out..
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