I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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