I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
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