I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
