goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
vagina is talking i cant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize