do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
