Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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