I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
