Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
this will be a night to untag.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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