We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
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