We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me