I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
