Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty

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(256): View more from Alabama

FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.

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(813): View more from Florida

She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.

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These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Read it at the TFLN blog
(301): View more from Maryland

The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"

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(713): View more from Texas

I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic

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(813): View more from Florida

We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.

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(850): View more from Florida

I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.

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(703): View more from Virginia

i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house

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