I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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