Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize