so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.