hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize