dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize