It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
