u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
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she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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