And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
