i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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