Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
