Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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