haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
