that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
