didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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